The Ugly Truth

I haven't done an "Ugly Truth" installment for a while.



I was looking at these photos and thinking about how the kids are all smiles and it looks like we had this really great day out in the sun. That would be quite far from the truth. I'm sitting here waiting for the knock at the door for the Mommy police to come and take my license away.

It was one of those days.

I don't know what is going on, but suddenly my voice has become what my mom calls, "Background noise" to the kids. They either aren't hearing me, or they're ignoring me, or choosing the blatantly disregard everything I ask them to do. The simplest task is requiring 4 or more requests.



And this Mama has had it.

Things got ugly around here today.

I actually heard myself say, "You're INSANE if you think you're getting a Popsicle."
It was at the end of dinner, at the end of a very challenging and trying day, and there was a bold request for a treat.
I was on the phone with Dan at the time and he said he knew I was at the end of my rope when he heard that.

He knows I hate name calling. It's just not something that's allowed in our family.
And I called one of our kids "insane."
Not my best moment.

The boys were in bed at 7pm tonight because I decided it was just better to end the day right then before it deteriorated any more. Sometimes you just have to salvage what's left, you know?

I share this, because I have always wanted this to be an accurate portrayal of our life. The peaks, valleys and the small bumps along the way. And because I want to make sure that I don't portray myself on this blog as anything other than what I am.

An imperfect mom that struggles at times to be patient. 
That loses her temper.
That calls her child "insane."
That fails despite my best efforts.
That has crummy days and wonders if my kids will always remember this.
If these moments will overshadow the happy times in their little lives.



Sigh.

I'll just add this to the list of things that I've said/done that I'm certain I NEVER would have thought I would say or do prior to having kids.


I love the simplicity of children's books.

And my love for "Lilly and the Purple Plastic Purse" has been documented here.

I don't have access to the book here (richland) but from memory, there is a line in a note from Lilly's teacher that simply reads....

"Today was a bad day.
Tomorrow will be better."

I hope so.