Merry Christmas, Dad

Dan and I traveled home for a very quick trip this past weekend.

Just one night to help out with Mom's holiday decorating.   The holidays are still a bit of a tough time...
doing holiday chores that Dad used to do...
seeing boxes with his handwriting...
all conjure a now familiar ache.
But I think once we're in the swing of the festivities with the kids it'll get easier.
It's hard to feel sad when the children are so full of joy.
They are so good for my heart and I know they help Mom too.

We stopped by the cemetery on the way out of town.
It's important to me to remember Dad at the holidays and I won't be home again before Christmas, so I wanted to go to his grave and help Mom decorate and have the children participate.

There is a grave near Dad's that is always decorated with a LOT of stuff.
Kaitlin always seems to make a bee-line for it and takes the decorations.
(We're careful to put them back).
Her tutu is such a cheerful contrast in the serene cemetery....Her Grammie had that waiting for her to her sheer delight upon her arrival.
She saw it and put her hands to her cheeks and said, "That's for me!" :)

The kids liked helping hang the ornaments, and Matthew thought the tree needed a star so he decided we should improvise with the tea light.

I have to say, as a man who always did the best with what he had,
Dad would be quite pleased with this improvisation....

It really is such a tender time.
I'm happy to have traditions that still include my Dad's memory and the children.
Andrew was feeling sad that Grandpapa isn't here...

Me too.

Andrew stood at Dad's grave and sweetly said, "Merry Christmas, Grandpapa."

Before we left, without the prompting of anyone, Kaitlin stood and said, "I love you, papa."

I left town with a heavy heart.

And then we received the gift of a glorious sunset on the way out of town.

I can't help but to look at this and think of heaven...

...and feel comforted.